Detox day 3
Nothing. That’s what is happening. NOTHING.
So much time resting
I woke up feeling nauseous and gross.
Detox is underway. I called the doc and said I couldn’t stomach the feral herbs he let me off. I’m taking them in pill form now. Even this was difficult to get down.
The greatest achievement of my day was washing my hair. That’s how basic life is right now.
Its made me reflect on people that don’t have enough food to eat and those in hospital forced to rest, lethargic and nauseous day in and out for months.
I’ve brought this on myself, I don’t feel sorry for myself. But it is a great time to reflect on how lucky I am to have my health and to be able to choose to go through this program. Even when its boring,sucks,hurts.
I got frustrated today not working/creating/hustling. I value success on what I do with my time. Being so physically weak to the point of doing very little makes me realise that I’m actually doing something huge.
Possibly one of the biggest achievements of my life, if I can make it to the end.
I read a girls blog of her journey on this program. She broke in week 3, the week we get to intro food (total get how you could break) but she broke with a burrito/block of Cadbury and ice cream. In the one night.
She was doing the program for weight loss so different goals to me. But I was shocked.
Yes I’m judging. It mad me so mad. In a irrational way. I was jealous she broke, day after day., planning cheat meals. I was upset that it wasn’t with healthier food, the digestive system is so fragile when its been through such a huge detox. I was ultimately mad because she voiced how hard it is and how hard it is to stay on track when it’s the most unnatural thing to do. I needed to hear a victorious story and I heard a human one.
I guess that is what this is about.
Seeing the flaws in us, the weakness. It mad me angry because I’m just like her.
She’s made it further than I have. I might be her in week 3. I’m human and can fail momentarily too.
So that was my day.
Ive had to write ideas of fun things to do because life is so boring not having my first love food.
Fun things when detoxing (not a joke)
- Flowers / this isn’t much but it brings me joy)
- Massage (I already get these daily) but that’s pretty much the only pleasure I will be getting. I supposedly start to small bad in the next day or two which makes me think I won’t be getting any pleasure from Benji for a week. The breath is supposed to be horrendous. Yay for me.
- Tea w friends ( I have 2 in Brisbane)
- I would say Netflix but we don’t have wifi (I KNOW)
- Sex – covered that already
I am really a lazy lady of leisure without the yoga and lunch with friends.
Wish me luck – the nausea is back.